100 Years War

by Andy Tremayne

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1.
Edwardian Bathroom 05:57
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VERSE 1 Your telephone is fixed to the wall by the stairs out in the hall Now the radio is warm warning of a future storm CHORUS Edwardian bathroom / brass taps and pipes Edwardian bathroom / everything is clean Edwardian bathroom / enamel and a pull flush Edwardian bathroom / at least what can be seen VERSE 2 Your expensive television gets three stations regardless of your homes location The transmission is frequently disrupted garbled ghosted and corrupted VERSE 3 I tiled a kitchen with broken mobile phones cook to the sound of distorted ring tones The TV's running an anti-virus scan on the look-out for license detector vans
2.
Seconds Minutes Hours 03:10
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VERSE 1 You've been counting seconds wield your stopwatch like a weapon But we're not intimidated just getting irritated CHORUS Seconds, minutes, hours VERSE 2 We've been patient for minutes but there's always a limit Yo how much people will tolerate before they won't co-operate VERSE 3 You've been going on for hours your voice is getting louder Trying to persuade but we won't be played
3.
William 03:31
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VERSE 1 You have seen the passing of the years In this short in between period Accumulated non-sensical fears Talked up into something serious CHORUS Oh William, what's going on Oh William, what's going on VERSE 2 From one extreme to another What do you think will be the outcome? A deluge of noise and thunder Can you tell where it's coming from?
4.
Put Away Your Ukulele 03:52
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VERSE 1 There's no going back to how we used to live That's just as well So pull in the slack And get ready to give those bastards hell No time for frivolous follies You'll have to wait for your jollies CHORUS 1 It's time to put away your ukulele your double entendres and bawdy songs It's time to put away your ukulele and face up to what's going on VERSE 2 Now we're on the beach It's no holiday break Heat incoming Soon be within reach Not such a piece of cake It's deafening No time for whimsical vapour You'll have to mind yourself for sure CHORUS 2 And so you put away your ukulele your double entendres and bawdy songs And so you put away your ukulele and faced up to what was going on VERSE 3 They say that they'll learn from all our mistakes there But do they know they might not return That they're in for a scare It's not a show No time for lighthearted joking They'll have to keep themselves moving CHORUS 3 When will they put away their ukuleles their double entendres and bawdy songs When will they put away their ukuleles and face up to what's going on
5.
Unlearn This Hatred 03:05
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Unlearn This Hatred
6.
Scribble Merchant 02:15
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VERSE 1 They're going to show you how much of a mess they can be This is not a test, it's a strategy It's something to do that can counteract behaviour Maybe even stack things in your favour CHORUS Scribble merchant Scribble merchant VERSE 2 This may not make much sense in the abstract or concrete Could it counteract or maybe unseat the oppertune crutch Of needing to feel that you can always know the deal And that you have a plan
7.
Cheer For The Sociopath 03:17
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VERSE 1 He wears fancy shirts and expensive suits Never overt at the opera concert He fits right in his flashy car and handmade shoes Smoking a cigar at the casino bar He's the kingpin CHORUS Cheer for the sociopath, a violent person Cheer for the sociopath, aggression Cheer for the sociopath, a straight arrow Cheer for the sociopath, your idea of a hero VERSE 2 Such style and grace when he's punching people in the face You admire his taste as he lights a cigarette You're dazzled by his flair as he kicks someone down the stairs Beats them with a chair without breaking a sweat OUTRO Your idea of a hero Your idea of a hero Your idea of a hero Your idea of a hero
8.
Lucky Breaks 03:51
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VERSE 1 You've had so many lucky breaks You didn't miss your train Even though you were late You still caught it again But next time you might miss the sign Find yourself stuck in line CHORUS Lucky breaks That's all it takes for you to be successful Lucky breaks That's all it takes but you've been forgetful But when we remind you You say we're disrespectful VERSE 2 When does a village become a town is there a point it can reach? Can you predict what will go down Is that something you can teach? Or will you get yourself into debt With your lifestyle under threat BREAK Maybe in the future you will lose the City VERSE 3 Your way of life is from a magazine I've seen it like a fly on a wall Like something on a TV screen on the leather sofa you sprawl Waiting to be told what to be sold What you should consider trash or gold OUTRO Disrespectful? Really?
9.
Paraphernalia 04:04
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VERSE 1 There's a problem when you're on the scene People see your look and act obscene Jump to all kinds of conclusions Ask you to help them with their obsessions CHORUS Paraphernalia Paraphernalia Wherever you go Paraphernalia Paraphernalia People think they know They think they know VERSE 2 It's not any better among your crowd People still say weird things out loud Even though they are more experienced That's not much in evidence VERSE 3 It doesn't matter how you explain The argument runs out just the same People assume you fall on a scale Behind your back they make up tales OUTRO Paraphernalia They think they know
10.
Born Middle Aged 02:57
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VERSE 1 Being young to you is everything got to keep yourself in the swing If you want to be seen as a king but it's a fantasy I can't believe you're so much older your generation just a placeholder How is it I'm the one to shoulder the responsibility? CHORUS 1 I was born middle aged Born middle aged Born middle aged I'm not at all swayed I was born middle aged Born middle aged Born middle aged You can't persuade VERSE 2 Well now your posing as a get-down dude with your fancy clothes and your attitude But inside you're still as crude as you were before Now what do you want to call this some kind of existential crisis Or pretend you're just taking the piss on the dance floor CHORUS 2 I was born middle aged Born middle aged Born middle aged You've been played I was born middle aged Born middle aged Born middle aged Your satisfaction's delayed CHORUS 3 We were born middle aged Born middle aged Born middle aged And now you're afraid We were born middle aged Born middle aged Born middle aged It's all been a charade
11.
National Wax Brand 03:34
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VERSE 1 A once powerful organisation That no longer has any influence Fell into stagnation Not that it makes a difference CHORUS 1 Is this Victorian? Perhaps it's Edwardian Or maybe Dickensian National wax brand Is this Capitalist? Perhaps Internationalist Or maybe Socialist National wax brand National wax brand National wax brand VERSE 2 Now all that's left is cardboard A faded old wrapper No financial reward A business sent to the scrapper CHORUS 2 Is this practical? Perhaps it's taxable Or maybe irrational National wax brand Is this history? Perhaps bourgeoisie Or maybe a mystery National wax brand National wax brand National wax brand
12.
Space Wizards 02:30
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VERSE 1 All the problems in the world today But you don't have anything to say Don't have any kind of opinion You don't keep up with the news Don't hold any particular views An uninterested civilian But still you talk about CHORUS Space wizards VERSE 2 So you turn a blind eye To all the things passing by Outside your comprehension You have no any interest In socio-political unrest You don't pay any attention But yet again you shout
13.
I Know You're Lying 03:13
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VERSE 1 You always assume the worst Jump to conclusions first Every single time You can't be concise Asking questions twice Looking for a crime CHORUS I know you're lying No matter what you say I know you're lying Every single day I know you're lying Whenever you speak I know you're lying I'm onto your technique VERSE 2 You're trying to be polite But something's not right I think you're devious I'm on to your game It's me you're trying to frame It's getting tedious BREAK In the absence of evidence You make up an offence Like any other blowhard You judge me by your own low standards OUTRO I advise you to take a vacation For the purposes of self fornication
14.
Funk Amateur 05:26
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VERSE 1 You're sitting in your house looking at your stuff Wondering if your neighbours are going to call your bluff Do you have all the same possessions that they own Like a colour TV and a push button phone CHORUS Funk Amateur You're a Funk Amateur What do you want? Are you sure? Funk Amateur You're a Funk Amateur Does your lifestyle Make you feel secure? VERSE 2 The morning race to get to work Be first off the train ahead of the clerks Run down the steps of the station The crowd is heavy to your frustration VERSE 3 In your living room is a video player A stereo system and satellite receiver But you've heard a whispered rumour Your neighbour has a home computer VERSE 4 Over the bridge you take the lead But someone's gaining on you with speed Clutching hold of your leather briefcase The strain shows on your face
15.
No Self Control 02:41
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VERSE 1 You say you can't help yourself no matter that it's bad for your health it's become a psychological prop Now you find you just cannot stop CHORUS No self control VERSE 2 You thought this would be easy But then you began to get greedy A simple ruse to avoid the boredom Now it's a serious problem VERSE 3 Back then you thought this would help Now it's a drag like everything else A crutch for someone who was ambitious Now it's become repetitious
16.
Rise 03:30
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VERSE 1 I scratched your car with a ninja star Your carpet's been stained from being left out in the rain Your front garden has been invaded by Martians There's a broken window It's been hit by a submarine torpedo CHORUS I'm just trying to get a rise out of you It is such an easy thing to do I love the way you over-react it's entertaining and that's a fact VERSE 2 Meanwhile at work people think you're a jerk Your presentation was a cure for sleep deprivation The official word is that you're a turd I called your boss They're saying you are a net loss
17.
In The Park 03:21
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VERSE 1 It's late September Not sure what to do Trying to remember Looking for a way through It's getting cold out here Despite the sun in the sky So-called friends joke around Far away though they're nearby CHORUS 1 In the park in the centre of town In the park see what's going down In the park feel like a spectator In the park as a passive narrator VERSE 2 Tried to start again But people don't forget It's looking the same There was no reset No-one reconsidered So everything stayed the same It's too much like hard work And their prejudice remains CHORUS 2 In the park people are talking In the park they are all gossiping In the park about the divergent In the park and the impatient
18.
Train Up A Mountain 03:51
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VERSE 1 What you're looking for is a guaranteed score A clear plan A line of progression without deviation That can make you a man You've no time for hesitation as you arrive at the station You've paid your fare Want to get somewhere Not be an also-ran CHORUS Train up a mountain Train up a mountain VERSE 2 Now you've reached the summit you discover that's it Clouds are all you see It was supposed to be clear but the fog is near There's not even a tree You're even more unsure than you were before No easy explanations for your situation No obvious key
19.
Sure Fire Winner 03:45
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VERSE 1 You're dressed like a banker as you leave the tower Get out in the city do not be late The money sprays from you like a golden shower Your expensive watch is a heavy weight CHORUS 1 Well you look like a sure fire winner Experienced and knowlegable Not at all like a rank beginner You're strong and capable A sure fire winner A sure fire winner VERSE 2 Nothing says tosser like gold rimmed aviators Or wearing a jacket with rolled up sleeves Drinking champagne like a market speculator And inhaling the smoke from burning leaves CHORUS 2 Yes you look like a sure fire winner Experienced and knowlegable Not at all like a rank beginner So strong and capable A sure fire winner Yes a sure fire winner OUTRO Inhale the smoke from burning leaves Sitting underneath a plastic tree Inhale the smoke from burning leaves Sitting underneath a plastic tree Burning leaves A plastic tree Burning leaves A plastic tree
20.
Weak Teacher 03:15
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VERSE 1 You weren't there, you didn't know But you're pretending you were involved Holding an artifact, addressing the crowd No dissenting opinions are allowed CHORUS Weak teacher You're a weak teacher No outstanding features Weak teacher You're a weak teacher Not any kind of leader VERSE 2 In this room you are shouting Claiming that we're not even trying You haven't shown even a bit of patience Maybe because you know you don't make sense VERSE 3 Standing out on the pavement You are repeating lies so blatant No-one is believing your explanation Can't con your way out of this situation
21.
Break The Glass 04:08
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VERSE 1 So there's a problem No one wants to mention It's not getting attention It's been long ignored People claim that they're bored Hearing this broken record CHORUS You can break the glass but you can't hold back the weather VERSE 2 Public agencies Business authorities Ignore this catastrophe TV analysts Put down the activists Like they're clueless fantasists
22.
A New Start 04:11
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VERSE 1 I thought I'd only have one chance To change for the better my circumstance The pressure not to fail got to me I found myself all alone at sea CHORUS A new start You're looking for a new start VERSE 2 Things progressed while I held back Not even close to the right track The world that I knew had gone But I couldn't move on VERSE 3 The weakest link in the chain But soon the chance to try again The rain would be in my face As I walked across the market place
23.
The Wisdom Of A Fool 03:49
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VERSE 1 You took some advice But it wasn't right Now you pay the price Didn't know at the time Couldn't see the signs You'd waited in line for CHORUS The wisdom of a fool VERSE 2 You didn't suspect That you'd get wrecked But it went unchecked It didn't seem possible Never was on the table The advice was plausable
24.
People Don't Owe You Sex 03:17
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VERSE 1 You want to have sex With random people on the internet But they're not interested in you And there's nothing you can do CHORUS 1 People don't owe you sex you idiot That's not how it works People don't owe you sex you idiot You're acting like a jerk People don't owe you sex you idiot You need to cool down People don't owe you sex you idiot Before you hit the town VERSE 2 Doesn't matter what you say They're not going to look your way Because of your arrogance And sense of entitlement CHORUS 2 People don't owe you sex you idiot We're not impressed People don't owe you sex you idiot You're being a pest People don't owe you sex you idiot You're being rude People don't owe you sex you idiot You need to be removed
25.
Operator Error 03:57
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VERSE 1 Well I casually looked over your shoulder And memorised the numbers Then I quickly left the department store To check out your credit score CHORUS Operator Error Operator Error VERSE 2 Using your details to access the site I ordered some things to deliver overnight Can't decide which I enjoy more The stolen goods or the breaking of the law
26.
Feeble Radio 04:30
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VERSE 1 You were a flagpole but now you're flagging You were a banner but now you're sagging Why did we ever listen to you? Or pay attention to what you do? You were a leader but now you're trailing You were the winner but now you're failing How could we ever have been fooled? Now you're being ridiculed CHORUS Feeble radio Feeble radio You'll have to go You'll have to go VERSE 2 You were a beacon but now you're fading You were once waxing but now you're waning We were in the glare of your floodlight But now you're stumbling in the night You were a player but now you're losing You were a runner but now you're walking How can you stay a contender? Now you wilt under pressure OUTRO And now it's all over Bought out by a competitor
27.
Closedown 03:37
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VERSE 1 When you look back with nostalgia You have to realise There's a rose coloured filter In front of your eyes Frustration with the present Draws you to the past But that good time feeling Is not going to last CHORUS You're heading for a closedown A closedown A bring down A closedown A closedown A bring down VERSE 2 There's a sense of discontentment Watching repeats again After a while it's clear that Things won't be the same As the videotape ends It's clear there's not any more As the anthem plays out To an empty floor
28.
Your Offer 05:02
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VERSE 1 So you have decided to contact me again But this time it's different you're in my domain There's no way I will fall for those old lies Doesn't matter how much you try to disguise CHORUS I want nothing to do with your offer I want nothing to do with you I want nothing to do with your offer I want nothing to do with your offer I want nothing to do with you I want nothing to do with your offer VERSE 2 There's no way I'm going to assist with your plan It's clear from the start that it's a scam Doesn't matter how much you talk up your scheme It's nothing more that a fraudster's dream
29.
Empty Mansion 03:35
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VERSE 1 So we're having this argument again Where no-one listens and everyone complains They say there's /nothing on TV No music or movies CHORUS It's like living in an empty mansion VERSE 2 You say it's no good any more There's no dialogue and everyone's bored A lack of interesting conversation No entertainment or sensations
30.
A New Low 03:13
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VERSE 1 Seems like nothing has worked out in a while Lacking any sense of style Seems like nothing is happening Everything is stagnating CHORUS This is a new low VERSE 2 Progress has been so glacial Lacking in any potential No matter which way is chosen Everything feels frozen OUTRO A new low
31.
Square 1 03:57
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VERSE 1 When everything seems to have gone wrong and you suspect you've been a fool all along In amongst all the wreckage There's still something to be salvaged CHORUS There's no going back to square 1 There's no going back to square 1 What happened can't be undone There's no going back to square 1 VERSE 2 When your mind seems like a creaking gate and the last ten years feels like one long mistake There won't be another first event The past informs the next attempt
32.
I've Done Nothing Wrong 03:02
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VERSE 1 I never had a good reason why I should get a job wearing a suit and tie I get stared at on the street All the business people I meet CHORUS I've done nothing wrong I've done nothing wrong VERSE 2 You are a corporate success Claiming that I've achieved less I'm told I should feel happy for you That is what they say I should do VERSE 3 You treat me like a criminal Because I don't have much material But soon your illusion will end When you understand it's pretend
33.
Blame Me For Everything 03:50
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VERSE 1 Every time you didn't do what you wanted to Those nights you sat back and watched the tube The truth hurts your head You'd rather instead CHORUS Blame me for everything VERSE 2 It's so easy to think you're not at fault It can become your default excuse when things go pear You can stay unaware
34.
100 Years War 04:28
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And if anyone calls to disagree Tell them I'm in a meeting please INTRO Ha! Woah! CHORUS It feels like I've fought in a hundred year's war VERSE 1 Don't look at me you won't see the scars but I might as well have been fighting drunks in bars I don't know your name and I don't really care You're trying to scare but I know it's a game VERSE 2 It doesn't matter where we might meet In a crowded club or an empty street You look at my face think you see an easy mark But I've lived through the dark of a violent place BREAK Ha! Woah! OUTRO Ha! Woah!
35.
I Saw You Coming 03:34
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VERSE 1 Well you seem to have a lot of experience though it's all drab But a quick search reveals things that leave you in the lurch Your social life seems to be filled with strife Those video clips will survive any apocolypse CHORUS I saw you coming I saw you coming VERSE 2 There is no way to remove what happened yesterday It's all out there anyone can see what you did with your hair Those who explore they will find you on the dancefloor Your behaviour means that you'll be shown the door
36.
Crazy Kids 03:42
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VERSE 1 One of those Thursdays where you have to remind yourself it's not Friday things that seem permanent can very soon become temporary The mysterious people on the bus are a constant source of mistrust CHORUS I'm going to miss those crazy kids I'm going to miss those crazy kids VERSE 2 Why would someone do their hair in such an unusual shape and style Seems that to get themselves the crowd's attention they'll go the extra mile Some people dress to stand apart Being stuck in the background is hard VERSE 3 Someone comes along who looks like they're going to take your place from you It's hard to really know exactly what to say and what to do It seems like now you're going to lose the race Get succeeded by a new face
37.
Corporate Anthem 02:24
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VERSE 1 When you sing the corporate anthem Does it make you feel better? When you sing the corporate anthem Does your job seem to matter? VERSE 2 When you sing the corporate anthem Is it the promise of wealth? When you sing the corporate anthem Are you ignoring yourself?
38.
The Man 04:43
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VERSE 1 Looking like a background bystander to a news story You don't seem to register to the camera eye Like a minor character in a television movie You walk through the crowd no-one stops you to ask why CHORUS The Man has plans for you The Man has plans for you VERSE 2 Without you knowing you have been selected To be a part of a brand new scheme You're going to help someone get re-elected Be the ordinary face that's part of the team VERSE 3 So now they're got you standing on a balcony Addressing the crowd they believe you're sincere Telling them about how you're so ordinary You're just like them listen how they cheer
39.
Adjustment 03:14
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VERSE 1 I went from being broke to having more than ever before It felt like some kind of joke but now this deal is completely real It's going to take an adjustment to get used to this an adjustment because everything feels amiss VERSE 2 I used to be worried but am I sure that I've closed the door I am in such a hurry to confirm that things will not slip back It's going to take an adjustment before I feel fine an adjustment until the numbers are in line
40.
Tax The Rich 03:54
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VERSE 1 This town has become a playground for the rich While you're stuck in a waterlogged ditch They are hoarding their ill-gotten wealth Avoid paying taxes by stealth CHORUS Tax the rich Tax the rich There's nothing more to it Tax the rich Tax the rich That's it VERSE 2 You're disgusted by the behaviour of these people Their actions are borderline illegal But of course they make sure they have Plausible deniability in the bag

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released August 30, 2021

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